ITT: SAD JEDI

[form_iii]

Obi-Wan stood behind the little hovel he called home, tending to Rooh-the-eopie. He watched the first of the two suns sink below the horizon, halving the amount of light that bathed the desert. Dusk was here, and soon so would night, and so too would the bad dreams arrive: the images of terrified younglings and friends dying. But he closed his eyes against the early onslaught of thoughts. There was no need to let them plague him before their time; if he let them take him at any moment at all then there was no way that he could go on.

Opening his eyes, he stroked Rooh's snout carefully, calming her as she became restless. He made sure she was secured, fed and watered, then he moved onto her son, Tooh. Tooh wasn't big enough yet to be ridden, but that was alright. When he took Ferus to Mos Eisley they could walk and he would lead the eopies with them. He could ride Rooh home, or pick up some supplies and have her carry them. But the walk there would be good for them all, he thought.

Ferus Olin was inside the hut, taking care of whatever would pass for dinner that night. It wouldn't be long now before they parted ways, before Ferus took his leave to Alderaan, but for now the company was something of a comfort. Ferus was family, though they hardly got along perfectly. Ferus mouthed off, for one thing, and questioned Obi-Wan regularly. It was a little like having Anakin--

Obi-Wan stopped his thoughts again, patting Tooh and straightening up. Ferus wasn't Anakin. He never would be. But he had come closer to becoming Anakin than either of them dared talk about.

For now there was much pain for both of them.

He stood on the hill, looking east, toward the Lars homestead in the far distance. He waited for the second sun to set and wondered. He wished he could reach out with the Force to Luke, check that all was well, but he couldn't connect to him. Shouldn't, even if he could.

It was lonely in the desert, so far from everything, even with Ferus there. In some ways, Obi-Wan thought, more so because Ferus was there, comfort or not. They had both lost so much: friends, family, purpose. More than Obi-Wan could bear, he thought some days. But now they were guardians of the galaxy's hope. It would be a long, difficult job, but Obi-Wan would shoulder that burden. He only hoped that Ferus could too. He didn't know how the young man was coping. Obi-Wan barely knew how he was coping.

The sun finally disappeared, leaving him in relative darkness before the stars began to twinkle into life. He turned his chin up to the sky, searching for familiar constellations he would never find from this remote planet. He had never paid much attention to Tatooine in the past, even knowing it was Anakin's homeworld. It wasn't as if it should have mattered. But a remarkable amount of the galaxy seemed to orbit around this little planet on the outer rim.

And here they were, Obi-Wan Kenobi and Ferus Olin. Two men, stripped of everything, almost ready to say goodbye. How long would they need to hold together before peace returned?

Comments

[bellassa]

Ferus bit back a response that probably would have gotten him something worse than a scolding, and inclined his head as he started walking again, saying nothing.

His mind was of course still working through scenarios and possibilities, though. Stormtroopers were easy enough if you used your lightsaber, but that was exactly the problem - same with droids. If there were run-of-the-mill thieves, he was confident he could knock them out without using the saber, if need be. If it was an Inquisitor or Vader himself, as Obi-Wan seemed to have hinted at, well - then they knew his face and he'd ...

... not go there, he told himself, because he was thinking with anger, and he was not going to use that rage anymore.

Could he trace the ship if it were missing?

These thoughts occupied his silence as Mos Eisley came ever closer and he started to take in his surroundings differently, this time with the aim of orienting himself. Last time he'd been here there'd been a storm and he'd been weak, and so his steps grew a touch less certain when he tried to figure out which way to go. The Force, in this matter, wasn't all that helpful.

But he found his way, lead on through the town ... and then the Force did kick in enough for him to pause and share another look with Obi-Wan, because he felt a sense of warning.

And sure enough, troopers could be spotted in the distance, one of their ships obscuring what must have been Ferus'.

Great.

[form_iii]

He felt them. Obi-Wan slowed his approach as the clear sense of warning washed over him. He saw Ferus's reaction a second later, barely behind him, and he came nearly to a stop, but not quite, lifting his hand in an unnecessary gesture to indicate that Ferus should follow his lead.

In an instant, he was processing all of their surroundings that he had been taking passive note of, assessing their situation more actively. It was almost mid-day, most people were off the streets and at work, which meant relatively few witnesses, which was good. On the other hand, it meant they would stand out even more to the half dozen or so--four, he quickly noted--troopers waiting ahead of them, which was bad. They would be on alert, but what would they be watching for? If they were lucky, they hadn't yet done any investigating into the craft and its origins. But one did not count on luck when one had the Force.

One hand drew the hood of his cloak up to obscure his features while the other twitched toward his belt. The lightsaber was there, but for emergencies only. It was difficult to imagine what drastic circumstances might warrant its use, when Obi-Wan would rather die than draw potential attention to the young Skywalker whose fate he was charged with.

No. The Force would be their ally here. It could draw attention to them, to be sure, but not with the same certainty as their weapons. He would have to assume that Vader and Sidious were not feeling for the use of the Force on such a far off planet. It was the only way.

But the question was: to fight or to bluff? The latter was surely the safer route. But there were flaws in either plan: to fight was to draw attention to themselves and leave injured or dead stormtroopers to trace; to bluff was to leave unanswered questions and suspicion.

Obi-Wan nearly cursed himself for all of his hesitance. It had been a year and a half since the fall of the Order. Was he already slipping so much as to lose his instincts?

He thought of his old Master, and what he would do.

Qui-Gon Jinn would trust in the Force to guide him.

They would not choose between fighting and bluffing. They did not have to be mutually exclusive.

They would stage a theft.

He picked up his pace again, fully expecting Ferus to follow, striding boldly toward the troopers but keeping to the shadows nonetheless. He kept one hand partially raised, ready to call upon the Force to use their surroundings. First, they would need a distraction. Something plausible.

[bellassa]

Well. It was a good thing that Obi-Wan seemed to have some kind of plan, because Ferus was still undecided, not yet having come to a conclusion that mirrored Obi-Wan's compromise. He followed him, keeping a step behind him both to let Obi-Wan guide him, but also to shield him; he didn't have a hood with which to obscure his face and at this point he was more widely known than he'd have liked. Not as much as his companion, but still recognisable, and so he let his hair shadow his eyes and kept his gaze down - or seemingly so.

Naturally he was still watching everything that was going on around him, keeping special attention to the four problems at hand. Two troopers stood a little off to the side, guarding the other two that were investigating the ship.

Bad timing, Ferus thought. If they'd gotten here a little sooner ...

But that didn't help him, and he ignored the nagging in his head, the should-have could-have would-haves, and started subtly gathering the Force towards him. Because unlike Obi-Wan, he didn't quite trust it to be there immediately if he needed it. And because he was out of tune to it, he also knew that he wouldn't be the best partner to Obi-Wan right now, should they have to fight their way out of this.

Still he trusted his instincts. And they were telling him that they needed a distraction as well.

When the asteroid had exploded and Ferus had had to maneuvre his way out of the resulting debris to go after and save Lune, the ships had taken some scrapes. The wear on its hull was visible, the dents and scars marring the once-sleek surface, but that wasn't what Ferus was looking for.

The rear fin was damaged. Part of it sat at an odd angle where a smaller piece of had-been-base had impacted its center and exposed the workings beneath.

Well, it wasn't something he desperately needed.

It took two tries, but he broke that part away and let it fall.

It hit an engine on the way down with a dull clank, and Ferus lowered his hand.

[form_iii]

Obi-Wan's eyes trailed up as he felt that tremor in the Force, and saw immediately what Ferus was going for. That would work nicely.

He kept moving even as Ferus worked, diving through the shadows and masking his presence instinctively, getting closer and around the Imperial starship.

The piece of ship--and for a moment Obi-Wan had to lament that they were damaging Ferus's passage offworld, but he was sensible enough to see where the benefit outweighed the cost--tumbled and clattered, and the two troopers off to the side reacted. One signalled to the other, closer to the ship, to wait, moving around the side to get a closer look at what had happened.

Perfect.

Obi-Wan hurried forward, sweeping a hand out. The trooper tumbled, tripping on seemingly mid-air, falling to the ground just out of sight of his compatriots. His blaster, apparently by coincidence, fell from his grip and skidded away from him across the sand-covered road. The Jedi snatched it up without delay--and promptly turned to Ferus, tossing it his way with a little push from the Force to make sure his aim was true. He stepped over the downed soldier and onto his helmet, preventing him from getting a good look at the ambushing party.

"Comda," he barked at Ferus, loud enough for the soldier beneath his boot to hear but not for the other, farther soldier to do so. Then, directed at the trooper, he said, "boonowa tweepi, D'emperiolo stoopa. Meetix sheep."

It didn't matter if either Ferus or the soldier understood him. The effect was what mattered.

But this was just one, of four, though at least the next wasn't too close to his fellows. Obi-Wan couldn't hesitate. Getting the drop on the others wouldn't be as easy, but he had no time to stop and think. They had to keep moving.

"Steey dow," he reminded the soldier, though he didn't yet edge off of him. He lifted one hand, subtly, reaching out toward the next soldier. It was a shame he was still effectively unarmed, but it made more sense to him for Ferus to have the blaster. Obi-Wan's connection to the Force was stronger, and he didn't particularly care for the weapons anyway.

But let the next one come, let him respond to that silent tugging, let him investigate the disgruntled cry his partner had let out. Obi-Wan felt sure and confident. He and Ferus would be ready.

[bellassa]

Ferus felt immediately more at ease with a weapon in his hands. Even if he'd never feel as at home with a blaster rifle as he would a lightsaber he'd still used blasters frequently and with confidence in the Wars, and he knew his way around this model; it was a standard Stormtrooper blaster and he'd had to use them in various scrapes before.

Having folded up the stock to change the blaster's two-handed grip into a one-handed one as he watched Obi-Wan keep the first trooper's face in the dirt, he'd then slunk away towards the back of the ship since Obi-Wan was handling this current one so well.

Whatever that language was - Ferus thought it had to be Bocce - it seemed to have startled the trooper for the moment, and from what Ferus could pick out, he'd been given orders he would prefer to follow.

He had no idea what comda meant, but he could sense the changes in the immediate air around them, ones Obi-Wan was responsible for, and Ferus stood ready once the next trooper came to investigate.

Seeing his comrade on the ground with an unknown figure over him stunned him for half a second that Ferus made sure to use, and as the trooper made to aim his own blaster at the pair, Ferus was on him with a sharp Force-leap assisted kick to his side to make him lose that aim - and his balance.

The trooper shifted immediately when he was down, moving to take aim at Ferus from below him, but Ferus had anticipated this and reached out with his free hand to use the Force to pry the blaster from his fingers and fling it away. It ... worked well enough, when it ended up out of reach, but it had taken a moment's struggle to accomplish.

Of course, most troopers carry a lightweight backup, and as the trooper moved towards his Ferus instead stomped on his hand and kept his weight there, making the trooper grunt and hiss with pain.

He kept his blaster trained on the clone, on his face - well, helmet - but it was more for the intimidation factor. Leaving bodies would be a mistake right now.

On the other hand, it would be highly impractical to even leave the man conscious, so after a split second of consideration Ferus took a step back, waited for the trooper to move again, reaching again for his blaster pistol. Ferus came at him once more before he had time to fire, rolled behind him, came up on his feet - took an elbow to the jaw in the process as the guy realized what was happening and twisted and struck out behind him - but swiftly knocked the butt of his own rifle as hard as he could into the side of that helmet.

The trooper dropped, and Ferus gave him a little kick. Limp.

Okay, good.

He again shifted back against the ship and its shadows, turning his head in the direction of where the other two still were - one of them seemed oblivious, but Ferus thought that the other one kept too quiet.

Surprise them or wait them out?

Surprise them seemed the better option, but he shot a look at Obi-Wan, a silent question on how to proceed.

[form_iii]

Obi-Wan didn't pay attention to Ferus for more than a moment, feeling no worry for him and his capability to take out the stormtrooper. Instead, the instant Ferus had disarmed the man, Obi-Wan was snatching up the blaster. Blasted thing, really, but holding one would no doubt improve the image they were trying to convey. If nothing else, he found many beings were hesitant to talk back when staring down the barrel of a blaster.

It was of course also dangerous to have used the Force to call it to him, but the trooper he was standing on still had a view of nothing but dirt and sand.

While Ferus was dispatching the second, Obi-Wan was hauling his own off the ground, deliberately and pointedly jabbing the business end of the blaster into the man's armour. "Bsha," he spat, pushing him forward to the small doorway of the nearest building and shoving him inside. The man toppled down the stairs with a shout into what was probably a spice den, and Obi-Wan closed the door carefully behind him. Then promptly made sure to drag a fair amount of debris in front of it so that it would slow him down further. Probably it would take his companion waking up and letting him out, so that should buy them a few minutes.

Obi-Wan hurried back to Ferus, blaster at ready and carefully toggled to stun, and nodded to him before stepping forward to lead the way back to the front of the ship. They had to act quickly if they wanted to surprise the two remaining troopers. Even quicker if they wanted to make a swift getaway before any of them recovered.

"Zootoo," he snapped as they stepped around, lifting his blaster to fire.

[bellassa]

Stepping into tandem with Obi-Wan, Ferus fired as soon as he'd lined up the shot, which was right away; the trooper to the right took the hit in one shoulder, and Ferus fired again, hitting him in the same spot.

Unlike Obi-Wan, he hadn't thought to change the strength to stun, and while the blast wasn't at full power, there was still clear injury to the trooper and his arm hung limply down his side, a pained noise coming from behind the helmet. This didn't stop him from lifting the blaster with his other hand though and he fired off a shot that singed by Ferus' arm.

Less coordinated. Not his dominant hand.

Which was good, except the trooper unexpectedly angled his arm to fire at Obi-Wan instead, apparently assisting his buddy, and Ferus snapped "Zootoo" at the two of them without actually knowing what it meant, just following Obi-Wan's lead on that, and fired off two more bolts - one skimming just past 'his' trooper's face, and then swiftly one that was aimed for his hand, hoping to make him drop the blaster.

The other trooper was already using his smaller, lighter backup blaster: not as powerful, but faster, able to fire more bolts per second than their standard counterpart.

Maybe hoping to overwhelm them, especially as they no doubt noticed the absence of their two comrades.

[form_iii]

Obi-Wan had the time and awareness to note the effect of Ferus's shots on the trooper; more specifically, he noted the sounds of pain. So Ferus wasn't using the stun setting. He had long enough to regret not outright telling him to change the setting, as he should not have expected Ferus's first instinct to be adjusting the blaster's setting. But he couldn't fault himself for Ferus's ruthlessness, no matter how much his instinct wanted him to.

More important for the moment was disabling the remaining two troopers. They were seeking to overwhelm the Jedi-turned-thieves, that was obvious, and they were swift--almost too swift.

In a normal blaster duel, a being relied on luck as much as on timing.

But Obi-Wan and Ferus did not need luck. They had the Force. It meant they were faster still, surer in their aim and focus.

Ferus's last shot made the man drop his weapon, and Obi-Wan was swift to disable the last soldier with a few bolts of his own. He watched the stormtrooper topple over and a quick movement of Obi-Wan's hand ensured that he stumbled and fell into the one that Ferus had disabled, sending them both sprawling.

Obi-Wan was over them in an instant, head turned so that the hood obscured his features. "You will report this vessel stolen--later," he said with a mesmerizing wave of his hand before he kept moving toward and onto the ship, not waiting to hear the obedient repetition of his command from the fallen officers.

There was no time for that. They had to get into the air quickly before the local authorities--whatever ones were listening to the blaster fire and not too cowardly or corrupt to ignore it--made it to the scene.

[bellassa]

Trusting Obi-Wan to handle the troopers, Ferus had performed a neat Force-jump right onto the wing of the craft, disregarded the ramp altogether, and shortly found himself behind the controls. He input his codes, fired the ship up, shot a look at Obi-Wan to make sure he was inside, closed up the entries and wasted no time taking off from the ground.

There was some groaning from the mechanisms as they were kicked into gear, likely a result of both the way Ferus had pushed the ship before landing on Tatooine and the several days standing inactive in the desert winds with slightly-exposed parts, but the lift was reasonably smooth. Not as smooth as she'd handled before the asteroid in any way, but more than serviceable, and Ferus knew that he would still be able to push her hard if he had to.

For the moment, he didn't feel it was necessary, and he kept only a few clicks above the surface, focusing on distance rather than altitude as he started them on a course through what looked like an uninhabited part of the desert.

He flew manually at first but quickly input some temporary coordinates in the navicomputer and moved away from the controls to do a thorough systems check. He knew he wanted to check the hyperdrive, at the very least. It had failed him once before.

"Where should we take her down?" he asked, not actually looking at Obi-Wan as he input some commands and watched the indicator lights and the numbers on the monitors.

[form_iii]

Obi-Wan only began to relax again when they were in the air and exiting Mos Eisley airspace. He was not always the most comfortable in the air, but it was certainly better than their predicament from a few moments earlier. Thankfully Ferus had been able to get them off the ground relatively quickly. Even if the ship had protested.

As he considered the question, Obi-Wan sat in the co-pilot's seat, bringing one hand up to his chin to touch his beard. Mentally, he drew out a map of the vast stretches of desert they had traversed through to get from his hut to Mos Eisley. He had wished, on the way there, that they had had a speeder to cut the travel time to something considerably shorter than the many hours it had taken. But a speeder was incomparable to a luxury starship as far as cutting their distance down went. This ship wouldn't be comparable to much, as far as convenience went.

Maybe a sandcrawler would have been better. It certainly would have attracted a less Imperial crowd.

"Perhaps we should go as far as the western dune sea," he suggested thoughtfully, dropping his hand from his face. "Southwest of the wastes. I'd rather not land too close to them, should we attract any more attention than we already have."

He settled back, regarding Ferus. He thought for a moment, then decided to let him in on his reflections. "Impressive fighting back there," Obi-Wan intoned carefully to that end. It was not entirely a compliment.

[bellassa]

Ferus simply waved a hand towards the navicomputer in an invitation for Obi-Wan to alter the course and put in the correct coordinates for the location he had in mind. Ferus was not familiar with Tatooine at all, save the area immediately around Obi-Wan's home and some of it from the air. Which was sloppy, of course. He was normally a lot better than that, able to take in maps in only moments, visualize streets and geography and keep it in his head.

But again: the manner of his entry had been ... well.

Besides, he was still looking over the systems, frowning slightly at a few that came up with yellow indicators. No reds, though. And no alarms of any kind. This ship would stay in the air for a long time with some care, but Ferus didn't really plan to give it any once he'd gotten back to Coruscant. He could leave it at the lower levels. A place Imperials might be interested in but usually not a place they'd brave.

Frown deepening a little as Obi-Wan put forth that comment, Ferus picked up on the disapproval hidden in the words, and he shook his head.

"No", he said, which was true. He was performing below his average and he knew it, but it didn't matter so long as he got results out of it. Ferus had always been a practical kind of guy. Which was also part of the reason he let out a short breath and explained. "You learn to fight dirty when you need to. It gets the job done."

[form_iii]

Obi-Wan leaned forward to alter the course in the computer, staying silent for a moment as he did so. They would be overshooting his home to get to the western dune sea, but he would rather that than a more direct route. It would be somewhat roundabout, but that was ideal. Then he would simply have to make the several kilometer trek back to the Jundland wastes. But again, better that then risking his location.

At least, even if they found him, he had moved far from the Lars homestead. He would not allow himself to be traced there.

He listened, though, to Ferus's explanation. He just didn't answer until he'd programmed the course and sat back again. He considered the words and found he didn't entirely disagree with them. But it wasn't entirely his point, either.

"Of course," he conceded. "You do what is necessary. Permanent injury, however, was not."

[bellassa]

Ferus paused for a moment.

It was probably telling that he hadn't thought about that or felt any guilt. Of course, in being called on it, some conflicting feelings did emerge. He hadn't shot to kill. He still wasn't comfortable taking lives, but it was true that throughout his years away from the Order, he'd found it less and less difficult to hurt people if he needed to.

This, he reasoned, had called for some pain. There hadn't been a lot of options. But he saw Obi-Wan's point and realized, I'm still angry.

"No", he agreed. "It's not."

And then he swiftly finished the systems check, changing the subject.

"She might complain some more, but she shouldn't have any real problems. The hyperdrive still works. I was thinking I'd take her down to the sublevels and leave her there. She'll probably be completely dismantled in a matter of hours."

[form_iii]

Obi-Wan let out a deep breath at that concession. It wasn't quite the acknowledgement of his mistake that Obi-Wan might have hoped for, that would have been expected of a Padawan--but Ferus was no Padawan, and it was at least agreeing that the extent of injury had been excessive, even if not a full admission of his wrong.

And then Ferus changed subject not-so-smoothly. For a moment Obi-Wan considered pursuing the matter, scolding him properly, making him face the problems. But again: Ferus was not a Padawan. Obi-Wan was not his Master. Had Ferus argued the point or tried to defend his actions, it would certainly have been grounds enough to warrant telling him more thoroughly off.

As it was, he would let it slide, understanding that this was not easy for either of them.

So he nodded his assent and said, "good. The quicker it becomes impossible to trace--especially to Tatooine--the better. I trust you'll have no difficulty arranging passage to Alderaan from there?"

[bellassa]

"I still have a few friends left", Ferus said ruefully, voice dropping as he shifted in the pilot seat; leaned forward with his elbows on his knees, one hand brought up to his face. No, he wouldn't have a problem with transport.

He would have a problem letting those who could provide him that last favour go.

It wasn't even letting go, it was leaving, it was abandoning, it was cutting off. Parting from Malory would be beyond painful, he knew, but even worse would be losing Trever so completely -

and that was less than a day away. It hit him heavily, and he closed his eyes for a moment, then opened them again and looked out at the dunes and cliffs ahead.

"Should I say anything to Dex?"

[form_iii]

Obi-Wan declined to comment on that first remark. There was nothing to say to that, really--especially not since he understood how tenuous all of that was, for both of them. How few friends they had left in a hostile galaxy. Most of them, now dead. The rest, cut off from them. Even Ferus and Obi-Wan would soon be lightyears away from each other, and he would not count on seeing the younger Jedi again.

But, ah, speaking of friends. Dex.

He remained silent for a long moment as he mulled that over. Dexter Jettster was a good friend; reliable and loyal. That was why he had entrusted Ferus to him. Not to mention the truth that Obi-Wan was still alive, if not the specifics.

He would miss him dearly.

"Yes," he said slowly, knowing with certainty that he wanted to pass along a message, the content of which was less clear to him. But after a moment's pause he smiled to himself and said, "tell him, I'll miss his ardees--even if it wasn't actually the best in town."

[bellassa]

Surprised, Ferus laughed - it was a very soft, barely-there sound, but it was still unmistakable for what it was. It made him think of Trever, actually. Maybe because he already was. But he remembered Obi-Wan passing on a message from the boy that carried similar affections: you stink like a bantha.

"Alright", he said, shaking his head. "I'll tell him."

Dex had been a great help over the last few months but there weren't many left of the Erased now that Ferus knew, and parting from Dex - and Keets, and Curran - was yet another thing he didn't look forward to. It felt so final. Which, of course, it was.

So his smile faded and he straightened up again, reached over to tinker with something ultimately meaningless with the controls. It wouldn't take long at all to get to where they needed to be, not compared to the hours they'd spent on foot.

Acceptance, he reminded himself. Change keeps the galaxy spinning.

[form_iii]

"Thank you," Obi-Wan intoned with a slight incline of his head. The smile stayed for a moment more, pleased also that he had coaxed a laugh out of Ferus, but mostly because he was thinking fondly of Dex. It would be a great shame that he would never see him again.

But he would accept that. He would let go and move on with this, as all things.

Settling back in his seat, Obi-Wan stared out ahead of them, watching the endless desert and noting what details distinguished one part of the planet from another. The traces of Raiders, of settlements, of Jawas.

Over the wastes and into the dune sea to the southwest. He nodded to Ferus as the computer brought them to bear on an apparently arbitrary spot among the endless sands.

[bellassa]

Giving his own nod of acknowledgement, Ferus brought the ship down gently, hovering close to the ground for a moment before he set her down slowly to make sure she was stable on the shifting sands.

He hesitated for a second, but he powered her down completely. He didn't want to rush this. He didn't think he should. This was very possibly the last they'd ever see of each other, of anyone else of their kind.

This wasn't the last time he would be Ferus Olin, but at the same time ... he was leaving a real part of himself behind here, with Obi-Wan. The melancholy he felt as he kept his gaze ahead and his hands on the controls for another small while was palpable.

But he was calm.

Turning his chair towards Obi-Wan's, he sought his eyes, gave just a hint of a smile.

"Well, I guess this is it."

[form_iii]

Obi-Wan shifted slightly in his seat to look to Ferus, regarding the younger man for a long moment. There was a great deal to think about, never mind how much there was to say, and no longer any time left for it.

He counted Ferus among his few remaining friends and even fewer remaining family members. And this was a goodbye that was likely to last a long time at least. It was not the first time that he was saying a seemingly permanent goodbye to Ferus, but the previous time--well, so much had happened since Ferus left the Order, all those years ago. They were closer, now. More like equals.

"I suppose it is," he agreed gently, but he returned that faint smile. Slowly, he rose from his seat and reached out for the younger man, to put a hand on his shoulder.

[bellassa]

Ferus stood as well, but he took a step towards Obi-Wan as soon as he had, disregarding the gesture the other man offered him in favour of simply hugging him.

There were no reasons not to. Ferus was thinking it too, that Obi-Wan was one of his last family members, and well ... he'd learned to grow affectionate with family. More importantly, he'd taken it to heart, how meaningful and important it sometimes was to not hold back.

So he didn't. Wouldn't.

And he said softly, after a few moments, "thank you", and in that moment he meant for everything, even their differences and grievances.

[form_iii]

Obi-Wan had thought about it, just hugging Ferus instead, but he was far more reserved with affection than Ferus was. So he was glad when the younger man simply went for it. He likely would have given Ferus a hug before they parted anyway--for all he knew this would be the last opportunity. They should not waste it.

But again: so much to say and think, and no longer any time to do so.

Regardless, Obi-Wan hugged him fiercely back, letting it be a longer hug than he might have otherwise engaged. This was important.

"I should say the same to you," he said softly.

[bellassa]

Ferus held on tight for a few moments more, then stepped back enough to look Obi-Wan in the face, moving his hands to his arms for a moment instead, letting the connection linger until he let go after a friendly, affectionate squeeze.

He was smiling faintly again at the response, and in a way he found himself surprised to. There wasn't a lot to smile about here at first glance. But their connection would remain and maybe that was why.

"You think so?" he asked, and that's when he felt his vision start to blur, just a bit. "I keep causing you trouble."

[form_iii]

The squeezed was echoed exactly, Obi-Wan's hands on Ferus's arms for a moment before he lowered his arms and stood tall.

He didn't answer immediately, though he was smiling faintly too. Instead he studied Ferus for a moment as if assessing that. In truth, he was weighing his words.

"I know so," came the gentle insistence. "You are worth so much more than you think, Ferus."

[bellassa]

Feeling a surge of feeling, Ferus couldn't help but take half a step back, averting his eyes as he tried to ... tried to even begin with the guilt and shame that rose within him at Obi-Wan's words. And with those came pain. Behind that pain was something touched and appreciative and grateful, but it was drowned out by the noise of everything else.

He blinked and raised a hand to his eyes where he felt the burn, pressed his fingers against his eyelids, nodded. "I know", he said. "This mission means everything."